Where loyalties lay

It never fails that when discussion about interracial relationships arises someone brings up loyalty to the race (see comments here and here). The most common occurrence seems to involve black women being loyal to black men. Call me selfish but in my quest to find a mate I was loyal to no one but myself. Frankly, the qualities that make a good mate for anyone are independent of race. Limiting yourself out of (misguided) loyalty to a race is foolish.

Where exactly did this idea of loyalty to a race in choosing a mate come from anyway? I think it is a hold over from the time when race and economic status were more closely aligned than they are today. The white elite sought to maintain their dominance in society by controlling the social mobility of all others through marriage. In clinging to the idea of loyalty to race we preserve artificial racial/class divisions that have caused much grief in the world. Do we want to perpetuate these divisions or strive for something better?

In any case it is always entertaining for me to observe these discussions. Loyalty to your race will only get you so far in a relationship. When the rubber meets the road and you're faced with a real life flesh and blood human being all the relationship talk goes out the window.


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