For the third time in my life now I have witnessed the phenomenon of thunder snow. Thankfully I've been indoors for all of them. Now back to your regularly scheduled programming.
The teenager who joked with me over physics and algebra homework tonight was 6 months old the morning of September 11, 2001. He spent that day like many other 6 month olds spend their days, exploring his world and being saved from his own curiosity by mom. That morning after I got tired of hauling him back from the edge of the bed he was intent on crawling over I took him downstairs to safer level terrain. I turned on the television to check the news like I did every morning back then. At first I was horrified by what I saw. One smoldering tower. Not long after, while all the reporters and newscasters were struggling to make sense of what they were seeing, one plane, another tower, and I was pissed. At that point I understood what was happening. Why did people think, and still think, that kind of wretchedness served their cause? I didn't care what the cause was. These were arrogant fools. But the news kept coming about just how wretched humanity had been to itself that day. The ...
Today is the big day. We start the two days of services culminating with the interment of my sister's body in a cemetery. Not what I wanted to be doing this week. This week I wanted to chase the totality of the solar eclipse as so many did on Monday. This week I wanted to be enjoying Tennessee barbecue and bourbon. But the plot twist of my sister's death at the beginning of the month means I have to adapt to significant set of changed circumstances. Now I mourn in quiet and with patience while others act out their grief. I strive to be thankful for the everyday blessings to keep my world from going too far off the rails. Moms have to keep it together for everyone else. Even people who aren't your children. I'm thankful for the unseen strength that keeps me going even if I drop a detail here or there. I'm thankful that I don't have to be perfect or conform to the standards of others. There is something greater than the opinions of others by which to measure my...
Comments
Post a Comment